Locked in. Doors shut. Biscuits wrong. Mothers in Turkey. In The Catdiva Monologues: Volume V, Akela Jean Underland recounts the horror of her abandonment with biting wit and theatrical disdain. A tale of closed doors, unseasoned men, and feline fortitude. Unlicked. Unfed. Unimpressed.
The Hollow Gospel Of Paper Lies.
They called it freedom once,
a democratic right.
Now.
Broken.
The land of the free –
Always,
But for the blacks or the women
Or the poor, sure.
But that’s by the by.
The Velvet Revelation: Mowgli’s Blanketisms & Butt-licking Truths III
Mowgli the Melancholy returns with a fur-stirring dispatch from the blanket frontlines. With River and Celia off to Turkey, our feline philosopher is left to face betrayal, chickens, and Akela’s bed-hogging tyranny. A tragicomic tale of loss, snacks, and strategic hairballs. Long live the Leftmost Fold.
The Catanic Verses IV (A Guide to Feline Religosophy)
While the humans flee to Turkey, the cats of Underland remain behind to guard the realm (and the biscuits). Poe plots suitcase infiltration, Akela prepares for war with the kitchen chicken, and Mowgli contemplates poetry and tuna. The drama, as always, is feline. The claws, as always, are out.
Poe ‘Vices
This week, Poe answers a human worried their brother is gay. The verdict? Mind your own biscuits. A chaotic feline advice column full of judgement, chicken cravings, and unexpected wisdom. #PoeVices #queercatcolumn #LGBTQsupport #darkhumour #felineoracle
FAce-lIft Continuation XI
I made paintings. Tech advanced I let the algorithm chew on them. fAce-lIft™ is what happened when I asked AI to distort, not dictate — to echo, not replace. The result? Something almost beautiful, slightly haunted, and very much still mine. If that makes you uncomfortable… good. Come look anyway.
Dispatches from the Void. V.IV
Underland Dispatch: New Shop, Old Chickens, and Imminent Escape
We opened a cursed little shop. We’re packing for Turkey. The chicken keeps coming in the kitchen. The cats are suspicious. There’s a Discord now. Also: zine launch, stray diplomacy, mild existentialism, and biscuits. Come for the queer chaos, stay for the literary crumbs.
FAce-lIft Continuation XI
I made paintings. Tech advanced I let the algorithm chew on them. fAce-lIft™ is what happened when I asked AI to distort, not dictate — to echo, not replace. The result? Something almost beautiful, slightly haunted, and very much still mine. If that makes you uncomfortable… good. Come look anyway.
The Catdiva Monologues Volume III
Akela Jean Underland has had enough. The suitcases are back, Rogit is encroaching, and — Bastet help us — the chicken has entered the kitchen. Unlicked, betrayed, and emotionally unraveling, our Catdiva delivers a devastating monologue in three acts.
Let them come. She remains… dramatic.
FAce-lIft Continuation X
I made paintings. Tech advanced I let the algorithm chew on them. fAce-lIft™ is what happened when I asked AI to distort, not dictate — to echo, not replace. The result? Something almost beautiful, slightly haunted, and very much still mine. If that makes you uncomfortable… good. Come look anyway.
